CLAW: To my Pupbrothers - Thank You!

I don’t think it’s much of a secret that the thing I was most looking forward to at CLAW was the chance to get together with my brother and sister pups, for the classes and the pup events. I’ve said it elsewhere, and it’s important enough to me to bear repeating. Believe me, I was in no way disappointed! Not even the unfortunate shot to the shoulder during Saturday night’s mosh put a damper on that in any way.

I don’t know if I can adequately put into words everything I get from being part of this community. I feel such a strong bond of friendship and common ground with so many of the other pups. Although it doesn’t take much to bring out the playful pup in me under any circumstances, whenever I’m around my pupbrothers, it just bubbles out on its own. Even after 10+ years of being involved in the larger leather community, after a weekend among my brother and sister pups, I feel like it’s all brand new again.

It strikes me as odd just how much more intensely I’ve come to feel all of it over the last year. While my service and commitment to the pup community goes back further, it’s within the last year that it’s taken off so much for me. I’m not sure why that is, but it’s an incredible feeling that’s both re-energizing and humbling. Re-energizing because of just how fresh I feel when coming back out of puppy-time and how it re-focuses me on so many other things I do, both within the community and on the outside.

Humbling because I’m a part of something that is so much more than myself and brings together so many. Humbling because I’m accepted for who and what I am. And humbling because others see me as an alpha among so many with so much to offer.

I want to thank each and every one of you for what is – to me – a gift beyond price. I can only hope to give back a part of what you have all given me so far. I promise to do my best.

Like all of us, it’s back to the every day world for me. But I go knowing that I, as a pup, have a place where I know I belong!

CLAW 2013: What a Weekend!

Maybe now that things are a little less scattered in my mind I can begin to collect my thoughts. I tried several times yesterday. The words were there, but I couldn’t get them to come out in any way that made sense. Maybe it was that long stretch of road in front of us leading back to DC, knowing it was taking me back to the every day world. That it meant another CLAW was over and once again, I took away more than I brought with me.

It was definitely a great weekend. A weekend of catching up with old friends and making new ones, of fun and good times, and of opportunities to let loose my inner pup alongside my brother (and sister) pups. A weekend of being surrounded by hot leathermen and kinksters.  It passed so quickly, just like it always does, and I’m again amazed that so much got packed into so short a span of time.

And, yet, that same short span packs some potent seeds of change and growth.  Conversations that spark ideas, insights from others over a drink and a cigar, the beginnings of what I hope to be lasting friendships.  There are probably seeds I don’t even see yet. It’s a lot to sort through.

The thing that stands out most in my mind is watching at least two pups and a couple of already close friends begin taking their first steps into a larger world. Both have thanked me for being part of that, yet they gave me something of equal importance. In being part of their experiences, I got to see our community through new eyes again, to be reminded of where I’ve been.  By having the honor of being part of that, they helped strengthen my connection to my own roots. To be given the gift of such even grounding of myself is worth more than I can say.

I also got the chance to broaden my own horizons as a Dom to my boy, to learn more about his wants and needs and – hopefully – how to address them.  Boy Tom and I communicate very well, but there’s always room to learn and to grow. Both by direct communication and seeing his interaction with others, I got a few more pieces of that picture put in place.

I went into this weekend expecting an incredible experience. My first two were rich and rewarding; I expected the same from my third. My second saw me emotionally raw after being recently uncollared; this weekend allowed me to experience it all on a more even-keel. Once again, I left CLAW with far more than I arrived with (and not just from the vendor mart). I hope the seeds that were planted bear rich fruit.  

And I look forward to CLAW in 2014.