I Am a Pup...

I am a PUP.

 

I am a HUMAN person who has the energy of and sometimes behaves like a CANINE person.

 

I am not a freak who thinks they're a dog. I’m a person who recognizes and expresses a deep part of myself that behaves and responds that way.

 

It doesn’t matter how I look on the outside. The things that make me a pup all come from within.

 

I am not necessarily a submissive. Even if I am, unless I’m wearing your collar, I am not YOUR submissive.

 

I do not have to be down on all fours to be a pup.  But if I am…

 

If you want to approach me and don’t know how, "introduce" yourself. Approach me like you would a bio dog: hand down for me to sniff. If I am being handled or watched by someone, ask them first.

 

Belly rubs and ear scritches are almost always welcome. But, remember, please introduce yourself.

If I’m down on all fours and clearly in some kind of pup headspace, please don’t ask me questions or try to have a conversation with me. Beyond barking for “Yes” or “No,” I probably won’t be able to answer.

 

Do not attempt to feed me real dog biscuits or treats. They are just as bad for me as they are for you.

If you want to give me a treat, make sure it’s something I can have.  Again, ask first. If you don’t see a hander – or if I don’t have one – think twice before offering. I may have allergies you don’t know about.

 

I am not public property for you to poke, prod, yank, spank or otherwise treat disrespectfully.

 

My tail (if I have one) is not there for your amusement. It is there to add to my experience as a pup. To pull on it or otherwise play with it is both disrespectful and physically dangerous.

 

If I growl at you, I have a reason. Stop doing whatever it was that made me growl. I don’t like it.

 

If I yip and wag my tail, then I am a happy pup. Either that, or you have my chewy toy and I want to play!

Going Forward With a Look Back

It's been no secret that I've been pummeled the last couple months at work with a bad situation that has yet to see resolution. Add to it the frenzied final preparations for Metro Leather Pride and the packed schedule for this fall, it really only makes sense that I've had some occasional moments of feeling overwhelmed. Sometimes I can only wonder how I manage to stay astride of it all. Having the support of my husband and my boy and such good friends has gone along way.

But sometimes through it all I've found a part of myself missing the safety net that came with being a collared pup. That feeling of everything being okay just by Mister's voice or a glance at the collar in the mirror.

Part of it comes from having recently found the camo chew toy Mister J gave me way back when he first took me as his pup. I was so excited when I found it. I thought I'd lost it forever somewhere along the way. As much as I love my leather bone chewie, The camo rope is so much more special. And finding it brought back a flood of good memories. I've since kept it close at paw, just to draw much-needed strength. Silly? Maybe, but it's helped more than I can say.

It's not that I want to go back to that time or to re-enter service as Mister J's pup. I know I can't go back. Nor do I want to give up what I now have. I'm in a good place with my boy and in my journey. I wouldn't give up either for any collar.

It's enough to just remember. There have been other times when Mister J's gentle guidance (or that stern look and reminder) have come into my mind and gotten me through. I've said before - and will always believe - that part of me will always be His Pup Tripp. So much of what I am today is due to what I was given from Mister J.

And it's good to remember. that, while I'm now Sir to one and addressed as such by others at their preference, my roots as a collared pup are still there. Far better is it to look forward knowing what's been than to turn a blind eye on what's gone into making me who and what I am today.

So, once again, thank you, Mister J.

Becoming Pup Tripp

I don’t think anyone who knows me doubts the passion with which I approach and represent the pup community. In the years since I finally connected with my own inner pup, it has been one of my primary driving forces in terms of service to and involvement in the leather/kink community as a whole. During the three years when I was collared under Mister J, it was as His pup, and it was the conduit through which my heartfelt service was given. All of it with that same driving passion.

To understand it, and why that passion always burns so strongly, I have to go back to my earliest days in the leather/kink community. It was in that very first year, when I was collared as a slave, that I had my initial encounter with pup play and the Handler/pup dynamic. At Southeast Leather Fest 2002 I met Master Skip and his Alpha Pup Tim. A week later, at Folsom East in NYC, I encountered others. These struck a deep chord within me, one that never quieted once awakened. However, my Sir at the time seemed anti-pup and, therefore, I never explored or spoke up about it.

When that relationship ended in 2003, I soon moved on to join the DC boys of Leather. Here were people with whom I identified as a submissive, and I quickly bonded with them. It was more than friendship, but a brotherhood and a home where I felt safe. Where I felt I belonged and could be proud. It opened doorways into a world where I could feel and be so much a part rather than apart.

But the inner pup was still there. It just didn’t have a way out. Even though one of my club brothers was a pup, my own still stayed curled up deep inside. I see now that it was only because we didn’t have anything geared specifically to pups, and there were too few in the area. I know now there were some attempts to make that happen, but they never came to fruition. And, more to the point, there was still something that held me back.

I travelled a lot during these intervening years, and I encountered others of like heart. Those travels were related more to representing the DCboL or our community, and my focus was primarily there. The inner pup looked up an awful lot, enough for me to feel that energy connection.

A time finally came, though, when we numbered a few more pups among the boys. During the summer of 2007 we had at least four. I felt the connection more strongly than ever, and for the first time I actually got to talk about it. All it needed was one more push.

That came at Mid-Atlantic Leather, January 2008. In the cigar tent with a Sir whom I hold in high esteem and his pup, a boot-licking session and romp brought out my inner pup in full. To this day I still don’t really know what triggered it.  All I know is that I pupped out completely and, 45 minutes later, Sir Jason was bringing me out. And when he asked me how it felt, the very first word that came to mind was: NATURAL. I felt and knew I had found a very deep part of myself. A part that had wanted out for so very long, but I hadn’t known how to reach it. That first experience was so liberating!

I wish I could say I ran with it right away, but I didn’t. As I got further removed from that moment, I became unsure and embarrassed. I was afraid to sow it in front of my club brothers or anyone else. Silly, I know, but it was there.

Then came Olympia 2008. The DC boys hosted their 101 Dalmatians cocktail as part of the weekend festivities. For the very first time I pupped out in front of my club brothers and friends in the community. And I knew right away I had been wrong to hold the pup inside. They were so happy for me and supportive. I recall taking a quiet moment because I felt so happy and overwhelmed.  From then on, there was no closing off the inner pup from the rest of my life or myself. Pup Puddles (my first name) was out to stay.

And, one year after my very first pupping out experience, I was collared by Mister J at MAL 2009 as His pup. Soon thereafter he renamed me Tripp. And, if I was active in the wider community before that, my involvement and passion only grew from that time on. Mister J recognized my drive and passion as equal to his own, and he encouraged me to channel it into doing more as a pup for pups and our emerging segment of the community.

That eventually led to the founding of the Mid-Atlantic Kennel Korps (originally called the DC K9 Korps).

As much as I enjoyed my service to the boys, and as sincere as that service was, it’s my service to and involvement with the pup community that has taken me to new heights. Not just as a founder of a club for pups and handlers, but by being alongside so many who share that same energy that defines us and brings us together.

And that passion now goes into representing and doing my part for the pup community. To do my part so that others can find what I’ve found. To do what I can to show that we’re just as much a part of the communal whole.

Sometimes I look back and wonder why it took so long. But I know it had to happen in its own time, and I wouldn’t change it.